Beauty is most certainly in the eye of the beholder. And it’s true that if you’re ugly on the inside, it will shine through to the exterior no matter how much make up you put on. However, there is a lot of chat about being Soul Food rather than Arm Candy….. but when the beholder should be yourself… shouldn’t we learn to be both?
So many of us run our everyday lives back and forth, from one meeting to another, we get up early, get ready for the day, go to work, come home, prepare dinner, try to relax and head to bed to wake up and do it all again and look forward to the weekend where we talk about things that don’t matter to people that may or may not really have your back when push comes to shove.
We all like to think we take care of ourselves and the bodies that we live in… but do we really know what that means? Or are we just following the misguided food pyramid of life and calling it an existence?
Today, there is so much false emphasis put on what we should look like on the outside, it’s become easier to buy products to cover up what’s really underneath, that the underneath is often neglected.
I ask you this… would you marry someone just like yourself? If the answer is no, take a look at the things you would change.
So what really is the key to unlocking the door to being both Soul Food AND Arm Candy… Self worth, self confidence and a kick ass support network!
Here are 14 ways to become a little more of each:
Be Unmistakably Honest.
Learn what it truly means to be honest, first and most importantly with yourself. Being honest is not about being nasty, it’s about manning up and having those tough conversations and facing the realities in life. If you are truly unhappy in your current life situation – it’s on you to change that… so start moving, one step at a time.
Know the Road Will be Rocky.
“calm seas never made a skilled sailor”
The tough roads need to be taken to get to any place worth going. Sure you can bury your head in the sand at the mere sight of a few pebbles on the road… but you wont get far.
Do it For the LOVE.
Find something that brings you back to earth, away from any struggles and makes you smile. It will light you up and people can see that from miles away! Im not talking about alcohol or drugs, but rather something that calms the soul like meditation, yoga, freediving, walks on the beach, time with animals, painting or running.
Be Really OK Being Alone, Not on Instagram,.. Alone!
Don’t just talk about it, do it, if you’re not content in your own company… practice! And try turning your phone off for an hour here and there and remember what it feels like to not be caught up in the busy lives of others and the world around you.
Focusing on the good will raise your vibration and ultimately you will be presented with more good… it’s called the law of attraction.
Hold yourself accountable, no one is responsible for you, except you.
Practice Positive Affirmations
Don’t put yourself down. The power of positive self-talk is real! Practice positive affirmations, write them on your mirror, the more you say it, the more it becomes your truth.
Don’t Compare Yourself with Others
What they look like, what they have or their situations – truth is, most people have been through something heavy and everyone is battling issues you will never know about. So focus on your own business.
We ALL Have Flaws
Learn to embrace your flaws, if they are what you see in your physical body or what’s inside. No one is perfect – Instagram just makes it look that way. The most truly beautiful humans are the ones that brake the mold society puts us in and they are exactly who they want to be, unapologetically!
If you surf, skate, walk, bike, Crossfit, hike or paddle… just get moving.
Mistakes are lessons
Learning from the mistakes we make is part of growing up, the sooner you can start to look at the lessons you are being taught, the sooner the lesson will be over. If you ignore it or don’t learn however, guaranteed that lesson will re-present itself in a different wrapping… like the gift that keeps on giving! So my advice here is observe and reflect to allow yourself to move forward.
Learn to Let Go
Life hack #1!! Remember, letting something go and thinking you have let it go are often very different. If something still stirs emotion in you or triggers you somehow… that’s a good indication that you need to keep working on it and you havn’t quite finished with it yet.
Celebrate the Little Wins – Be Your Own Cheerleader!
We often forget about all of the great things we have done along the way, our goals we reached or the lessons we learnt. Be sure to reflect on your achievements and reward yourself.
Choose Your Friends Wisely.
You become most like those you surround yourself with. So leave the gossip and follow the dreamers, the doers, the ones that want to see you succeed and will be there every step of the way. Negative talk between friends is not friendship, leave that for the haters and surround yourself everyday with people that believe you’re the best thing since sliced bread! That’s friendship!